I would like to believe that my years of school and life experience have given me a sophisticated ability to read people, and that my first impressions are based on solid observations. The truth is that often my first impression of someone is made on their footwear. It’s not my best feature, but shoe judgments are as valid as any other method. It’s like the strength of a handshake telling you about the strength of the man behind it. I know everyone has a quality that they look for in others as a starting place to base their opinions about the new person standing before them; why not start at the feet and work up from there?
As the saying, so old that we don’t know who said it, goes, “walk a mile in their shoes before judging”. I feel that my experience with shoes allows me to make all sorts of judgments. I will be the first to admit my shallowness and say that I have made snap judgments based on shoes. Heck, I made two judgments based on shoes before 10:00 am today! I make those same snap judgments about my own shoes; my morning can hit a real boiling point when I become indecisive about which shoes to wear that day. It’s a cold sweat situation as I literally wobble with one foot in a 4 inch stiletto, one foot in a 3 inch wedge, a satin pump in one hand and my lower lip being chewed as I go through my internal dialogue about who I will be today. Will I be the smooth business woman whose heels click down the hallway, striking fear into the hearts of those who cross me? Will I be the fresh-faced summer-loving hippie in cork wedges who just wants to stroll through a street fair and buy funky pieces of art? Am I stylish bachelorette in a pair of come-and-get-me stilettos that only the most sophisticated man would approach?
It’s that unanswerable question: do the shoes make the woman or does the woman make the shoes? Each day I can be another part of the unique woman I am simply by choosing between a black pump and a black knee high boot. Before any guys roll their eyes at the challenge of a self-described chameleon of a girl, remember you want the lady that smiles sweetly at your boss’s bad jokes, tells your friend a dirtier joke during the Sunday football game, and remembers exactly how to make you smile when it’s just the two of you. No man should expect exact perfection in a woman; but when she is wearing the perfect red-satin strappy sandal, you just might forget any imperfection that does exist.
My mom once told me about a test she did when picking a name for us kids. She would say the full name as it would be announced on three occasions: scoring in a basketball game, winning an Oscar, and with the title doctor in front. I feel that way about my shoes. When putting together an outfit, I think about how the shoes will look as I causally hop over a puddle, step out of a car, or gently dangle my crossed legs at happy hour. If I get chills as I imagine any of the scenarios, then I know that they will surely pass anyone’s shoe judgment. After all, aren’t we our own harshest critic?
Call me crazy, but my shoes often give me the strength I did not know was within. The strength to stand solidly in the face of whatever challenge comes before me. Whether I am taking a strong stance at a meeting or walking out of a relationship that I did not want to see end, my insides may be crumbling but I at least I am keeping my head up, shoulders back, staying tall and strong even if its destroying me inside. Often times we walk the paths of life alone, and its good to know that, if I have take the difficult road, I am going to do it in shoes that, at the very least, show what I deserve at the end of that journey.
Amazing shoes give me the strength to walk up to that old flame who is with someone new and be in complete control. My shoe judgment will surely kick in as I smile sweetly, glance at her feet, raise a quizzical eyebrow and smirk a little. Sometimes the best shoe judgments go without saying. As shoe wisdom says, “These boots were made for walking and that’s just what they’ll do.” While the walk my not always feel great, the blisters and the pain are worth the effect as I click away. And to the naysayer, a final shoe warning about judgment: never forget what Nancy Sinatra said next, “One of these days these boots are going to walk all over you.”