The Island Shoe Girl's Blog

Where shoes meet sand…

I am the New Fashion Trend! February 28, 2010

Filed under: Common Sense in Unsensible Shoes — theislandshoegirl @ 9:39 am
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These Coach Rainboots were once lost to a clearance rack, now they are the silver lining to any rain cloud! Photo by Jean Thornton

Finally! After years of struggling to start the latest fashion trend, I have finally achieved success.  Yes, I am the new fashion trend!  My years of digging to the back of the sale racks, waiting out clearance markdowns, and reworking last year’s fashions to meet the next season’s styles have paid off at long last.  Being fiscally fashionable is now the hottest trend and I have been strutting this style for years. 

I have to smirk as I read yet another glossy-page fashion magazine telling me about the new way to shop during the recession.  Sorry clever editors, you are preaching to the choir.    Every struggling fashionista-in-the-making has learned how to be stylish on a budget.  For generations, twenty-somethings have worked creatively in order to balance a checkbook running on empty in a pair Michael Kors stilettos in order to keep up with the latest trends. We have forgone meals for Prada and endured gut wrenching e-bay auctions; suddenly we the “chic but broke” are the new trend!

My H&M off-the-rack simple black dress may not have been fooling anyone a couple of years ago, even when paired with BCBG shrunken jacket.  Yet, now that the financial tides have turned, the girls looking good in clearance rack discoveries are the new Style Goddesses.  Yes, Ruth Madoff just might need a friend like me to help her live with that “no purchases over $100” rule imposed by those unfashionable court conservators.  If Ruth had insisted that her husband invest in the very real stocks of her favorite designer labels—as  opposed to his made up ones—she might not be facing the drab racks of Sears. 

I like shopping— this no secret.  Like a Girl Scout with a box of thin mint cookies, I know that some things are too good to pass by.  I also know that the shopping fun ends when the credit card bill arrives.  In a time when shopping for the latest fashion is out of style, I toy with idea of selling a kidney for a shot at the new Christian Louboutain stilettos that I know spring will bring.  The rest of the world my take this time to be restrain themselves from the decadent lifestyles that many have grown accustomed to, but I say ‘don’t rain on my fashion parade’.  The only rain I will allow is on my new Coach rain boots that I look super cute in. 

As the financial sting starts to recede, those same magazine that have taken a sudden interest in affordable jeans will be back to pairing expensive jeans with handbags that cost as much as my mortgage payment.  But savvy and stylish girls like me will remember that in a few months that combo will be half price somewhere, it just might take some searching and patience.  While my time as a fashion trend will surely be as fleeting as pleated pants, all good styles come back. Keeping my fashion eye on the glossy pages of Marie Claire and my financial eye on the markdowns may just get me in couture somewhere down the line.  Until then I’ll continue my own trend of working those sales racks—and I bet the rest of the shopping savvy country may feel the same.

 

Creating Our Own Shoe Happiness February 21, 2010

Filed under: Common Sense in Unsensible Shoes — theislandshoegirl @ 10:49 am
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These Steve Maddens are perfect for waiting on good things and also going after what you want. Photo by Jean Thornton

I waited patiently the whole month of January for a very special delivery that was not arriving as quickly as I hoped.  In December I got an email from Jimmy Choo thanking me for my support of the their “You, Your Shoes, and 72” photo contest which also promoted their part of the Elton John’s HIV/AIDS Foundation.  As a gesture of their gratitude, I was asked to send my home address so they could send me a thank you gift.  As a supporter of local AIDS charity efforts I was thrilled to help Jimmy Choo with this cause, but if Jimmy Choo offers you a thank you gift, of course you take it! 

For weeks I discussed what little surprise Jimmy Choo might be sending me with my friends, family, and complete strangers in the grocery store.  We dreamed of everything from shoes to perhaps a secret new product that promised eternal life.  In truth it could have been a used gum wrapper and I would still have proudly displayed it and celebrated the mere chance to view it.  What can I say—I am easily amused!  Sadly, days and weeks passed and I had a strange feeling that Jimmy Choo had stood me up.  And with every day that passed without my Choo delivery I felt a little more disappointed. 

In the midst of my waiting for Choo, I realized that I had let my shoe happiness be swayed by outside forces.  And despite the fact that in this same interim I had bought seven other great pairs of shoes, I was letting the lack of Jimmy Choo’s package bring me down.  After all I am a very lucky shoe girl with a closet that literally overflows with pumps, boots, stilettos, and platforms.  Yet, it was that one package that had not arrived that was causing me to slip into a shoe defective disorder every time I saw my empty mailbox. 

As I pondered how one missing package from Jimmy Choo had distracted me from the pleasure that waited in the many other shoe boxes I already had in my possession, I realized that it is not just with shoes that I sometimes allow others to determine my happiness.  I couldn’t help but wonder if this wasn’t a Choo metaphor for so much else in life.  Do we constantly look for what we don’t have and ignore what we do have?   

I thought about the many successes I have achieved through my own hard work and determination.  And while I am very proud of my professional achievements and some personal points of pride such as owning a home or earning accolades from co-workers and peers, sometimes it’s what I don’t have that seems to draw the most critiques from myself and others.  The questions about what I don’t have often seem louder than the appreciation for what I do have.   Well-meaning family and friends will frequently congratulate me on a career milestone and then ask who I am dating, or they will question why I seemingly focus on shoes over children.  While I don’t want to discredit the joy that a partner or a child could bring to my life, it still stings to feel like it’s a missing piece or a barrier to my happiness.    Just like the promise of  a missing Jimmy Choo thank you gift lessened the excitement of the many shoes I bought that month, the things I don’t achieve often block the sight of what I do have.   

It was when I decided that I would not let Choo rain on my parade that the package arrived—and isn’t that often true in other life situations!  The thank you gift was a tote bag promoting the newest line of Jimmy Choo shoes; what shoe girl wouldn’t want to proudly display this bag?  And while it is lovely, it is not nearly as fun as new Kate Spade leather handbag that also arrived that day. 

In the end I learned two important lessons: first, always ask for a tracking number when it comes to designer return addresses, and second, what others offer us can be wonderful, but we offer ourselves should never be overlooked.   I am very happy to be the only shoe girl in Key West carrying a thank you bag from Jimmy Choo, but I am also thrilled to be wearing my new LAMB heels too.  It’s true others may help us find happiness, but it’s good to know that in the end I get the final say—or shoe—in what that happiness is.

 

Future Shoe Girl Needs Your Vote NOW! February 14, 2010

Filed under: Uncategorized — theislandshoegirl @ 12:06 pm

My friend’s super cute baby Genevieve is in the top 10 of the Parent’s Magazine Cover Baby Contest… While she is not able to stand or walk she already shows a love of shoes. The winner gets a scholarship so this little shoe girl in the making can save for Manolos instead! So vote for Genevieve at
http://photos.parents.com/category/vote/photo/989…96 It called Genevieve sees dad… Thanks!

 

Getting Her Mrs. February 14, 2010

Filed under: Love Me, Love My Shoes — theislandshoegirl @ 10:22 am
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You may not be a gold digger but these gold Nine West heels are perfect for picking up whatever you love...men or shoes. Photo by Jean Thornton.

Valentines Day has traditionally been a day of showing love and devotion through candy, flowers, and jewelry sold at mall chain stores.  I prefer to go with Stephen Stills advice and love the shoe I’m with…okay maybe he meant love the person your with but I am taking poetic license with this one.  I am not a relationship girl and while I admire those who can stay in a relationship, I am happy to watch their devotion of love, arguments, break-ups and sobbing fits from the outside. 

In college I watched many very smart young women who had chosen majors listed in the college course catalogue, but spent most of their time researching Mister Right at parties.  I met many of these ladies who had no further ambitions than getting married.   Yes, they are perfectly capable of working and are very smart, educated women.  Yet, no matter what their diploma says, those girls got their M-R-S.

Some may be skeptical about this existence of the “Mrs.” certified crowd but look no further than your television screen.  The whole premise of the television show The Bachelor is that hoards of women will put their whole lives on hold to pursue a man they have never met and in hopes that he will select them.  As these ladies work the room like a stripper works a pole, production puts their name, age, hometown and the occupation they are willing to leave behind in order to marry this mysterious stranger.  Thousands apply, but only 25 women get to publicly date a man they know is not only seeing someone else, but that someone lives in their house.  Still they fight for the right to be dumped in front of their competition in a search to get the coveted “Mrs.” in front of her name. 

A friend once asked if she could nominate me for The Bachelorette, to which I responded that as much as having 25 men willing to become unemployed, move into my home and life on a whim, sounded absolutely fabulous (note sarcasm here) it sounded a lot like my job at the homeless shelter.  The concept seems ridiculous when I consider it in reverse so how can it not seem ridiculous when these women are filling out their online contestant application while skimming bridal magazines?  Should I believe that these women are truly searching for a fairytale love that can only happen on network television?  Or should I give into the sinking suspicion that these ladies are looking for only the amazing engagement ring at the final rose ceremony? 

If I break away from The Bachelor season 75 and turn my remote control towards a more sophisticated basic cable station, Bravo, I am afraid I find more of the same.  The Millionaire Matchmaker is back to interviewing an unending line of women who want to marry millionaires.  As the unmarried (those who can’t, teach) match-maker critiques women and tells them to push up their breasts, line their eyes, and laugh at his jokes to help snag a piece of the checking account and an enchanted ending.  That’s right, they are not looking for the good old-fashioned Catholic boy my grandmother hopes each of her granddaughters ends up with, but instead are counting the zeroes on his credit limit.  Why base a relationship on common values when you can base it on his net worth?  

As a woman who wants to be viewed as a successful, independent person who can stand on her own two feet, what I struggle with is the concern that the whole female gender gets lumped into one category of someone who does not need to be taken care of, but wants to be taken care of.  The easy solution is to change the channel and hope that it is not a Girl’s Next Door marathon on E! this weekend.  But the irritation remains within me that there is an industry the viewing public buys into, that promotes this image of woman as the standard not the exception. 

A part of me wants to not be bothered and to say “let each woman chose her own way in life”, and if that is the “Mrs.” path they want, then you go girl!  After all, there are many that question the path I have taken and the shoes I take it in.  Can I be secure enough in my own choices to be comfortable with the choices that are completely different from my own?  Perhaps the true test of an independent woman is to watch without judgment the choices of others and still be happy and secure in her own. 

Yes, maybe I am secure enough in my own life choices to accept the choices of women; whatever those choices are.  Hey, maybe someday I will want to get to my “Mrs.” and maybe I will take up throw pillow selection full time. Until then, I am putting on Running in Heels—are these girls the magazine moguls of tomorrow? That remains to be seen.  But at least they are fighting for a job, not a man.

 

PARTNERING UP February 7, 2010

Filed under: Love Me, Love My Shoes — theislandshoegirl @ 9:51 am
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These BCBG heels are the perfect partners for my feet! Photo by Jean Thornton

It’s hard to be a single person.  The partner idea has been pounded into our heads since birth.  As soon as a child enters the world, the new parents envision his or her future and much of this future has a partner in the picture.  From the partner you share your crayons with to your lab partner, the message is clear.  Nothing strikes more fear in your heart then the phrase “partner up”—whether for gym class or to give a presentation—you have to commit to this other person who will now become half of you.  

Marriage is the ultimate “partner up” of life.  The natural progression is one that involves the acceptance of a permanent partner.  No one wants to think about the inevitable reality that our parents will leave us.  Our siblings will develop their own separate lives and families.  So it is undeniable that there is pressure to find that partner before it’s too late and we are left holding the bag alone.  But what do you do when you do not have a partner?

Since there is such great pressure to find this partner, I can only assume that the benefits of this partner must be numerous.  As a single person my successes and my failures are my own and mine alone.  There is a rush of pride I feel when I achieve a success, often followed by a let down when there is no one to share in my happiness.  Buying my first home was an amazing step in my life; however, dragging all those boxes in by myself was not so amazing.  When I was wrestling my new Pier One console table out of its box that could have been described as the ultimate death match, that sense of joy dwindled.  I have heard some friends and family talk about popping bottles of champagne when unlocking the door as homeowners; all I popped was Tylenol for aching muscles.  This was compounded by the look people gave me when I said I bought a home…alone… without a man… without help from dad… and I was living in it alone.  It was like saying I did not need the sun.  One person said what a great catch I was for a guy since I now had property attached to me.  Throw in two donkeys and I am one hot piece of ass! 

Even in my education and career, I find this push for a partner.  A professor whom I respect greatly gave me one of the biggest boosts of my academic life when he nominated me for a prestigious award.  He encouraged me to continue my education past my master’s degree and pursue a doctorate.  As I explained my desire to strike out into the world and gain a better understanding of what life was, he nodded with sincerity.  He understood the urge to learn life lessons from living.  He then said when I was married and had babies I could go back to school.  I felt like I had been pushed down an ivory tower.  I wanted to pick up my pots and pans and go home. 

So I go home to my condo I own alone.  To the dog and cat I alone walk and feed.  I open the bills addressed only to me and write the checks that come only from my checking account.  I control the remote!  That’s right whether I want to watch hours of Bravo or Glen Beck, I am an independent woman when it comes to my television viewing.  Unfortunately E-harmony, Match.com and a million other dating services are bombarding me.  All I need to find love is a lap top, wi-fi, and a team of experts to match me with somebody in St. Louis. 

Do I believe that you have to have a partner to be in happy in life?  Probably not.  Do I believe it makes life easier to have a partner?  Some days it might; some days it might not.  Do I believe that as long as I am not with a partner that I will be questioned as to where that partner is? Ugh…yes.  Do I think married girls still deal with the partner question? Definitely. 

It comes down to that undeniable push.  We are told to find that partner, but once it is found I can only assume there is some challenge to maintaining the partner balance. Even crayon partners sometimes hogged the blue crayon; surely there must be similar challenges when it comes to sharing in a marriage.  So perhaps the best advice to give on the partner hunt is this: there are times in life when everyone longs for a partner and there are times in life when everyone longs to be alone.  Single or partnered up, you will face both times.

 

 
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