The Island Shoe Girl's Blog

Where shoes meet sand…

A Stiletto Teaching Moment October 16, 2011

Filed under: Love Me, Love My Shoes — theislandshoegirl @ 10:12 am

A good teaching moment should never slip by. Photo by Jean Thornton

This week could best be described as hectic.  It should be noted that this blog is actually being written on Saturday morning, and I generally have my blog written, proofed and ready to post by this time.  At times the past week felt like an all out free-for-all.  Let’s just say that some of the highlights included helping the Wild Life Rescue capture a wounded falcon outside my office and trying to find a basket large enough to hold 65 biodegradable balloons.  FYI… there isn’t one, and—you can’t release that many balloons at one time without some clearance from the airport.  If my grad school professor had told me there would be weeks like this, I probably would have reconsidered a good portion of my career choices.

A lesser shoe woman might have cracked on Wednesday and put on a pair of flats.  But even a fall on the stairs on Thursday (really hoping my wrist is just sprained) could not sway me from my stilettos.  I would be lying if I said that my arches weren’t aching by 5:30 on Friday as I walked through the grocery store searching for dinner.  Of course my mind was probably far more worn out; it’s a great victory that I ended up with the correct ingredients at the checkout.

As I swiped my groceries at the self-check aisle, a sales associate from the grocery stores came over to me.  She was younger, probably only 19 or 20 and was unfortunately relegated to standard pair of ill-fitting black pants, a white store button-up shirt and some very unfortunate—and I am guessing—required black shoes with the tell-tale rubber soles straight from the dress code section of an employee handbook.  (Note: I have never suffered a grocery store injury due to my shoes.) 

“I love those shoes,” the girl said timidly at first.  It took me a minute to even register that she was speaking to me, as I was lost in finding a bar code on a much-needed bottle of Aleve.    I smiled and said thank you.  It’s not uncommon for me to get compliments on my shoes as they are usually pretty different than the flip-flops and sandals you see on an island.  However, this young lady was not done.  She stood next to my checkout and asked, “Where did you get those?”  I explained I had found them online and gave her the shoe designer even though I got them about 3 years ago and was certain they were long sold out. 

My eager sales associate persisted though, “How do you know what size to get?”  At this point I figured I could blow her off and hurry home to a bottle of red wine anxiously awaiting me there.  Or I could impart some shoe knowledge to this girl.  I decided to take one for the stilettos and began teaching this future shoe girl how to determine her correct shoe size in a variety of designers.  At the end of our conversation I was giving her the name of a few stores where she could find good deals on a variety of shoes and have the opportunity to try on many sizes.  I explained how one good day of shoe shopping on the mainland could help her find correct sizing online.

As another customer frantically pushed the help button on her own self-check register, we said our goodbyes.  I glanced back as I walked away and saw her begrudgingly assisting the other flat-footed woman with her cans of cat food.  If I were her store manager I probably wouldn’t be too impressed with this young lady’s customer service.  But as a future shoe girl, I saw great potential.

In our busy lives it’s easy to overlook the moments where we can help someone, perhaps shape the path they take in life…or at least the shape of their footsteps.  Perhaps that girl’s week was worse than mine—I mean having to wear her shoes would be pretty brutal.  So maybe my giving her a little bit of shoe advice will help her walk a little bit taller or put a little spring her step.  After all, having the chance to offer my opinion to her certainly made my stride a little lighter.

 

Family Tradition August 21, 2011

Filed under: Love Me, Love My Shoes — theislandshoegirl @ 10:27 am
Tags: , , , , , ,

A perfect pair of Dolce and Gabana heels for a girl who loves stilettos, island life and and little drink now and then! Photo by Jean Thornton

Hank Williams Jr. sums up his tendency to drink, smoke, and sing all night long by claiming it is a family tradition.  I now can make the same claim about my own habits of wearing stilettos and drinking wine.  It seems that my love of shoes and appreciation for cocktails have deep-seated roots in my family history. 

For years I figured I got my love of shoes from my grandmothers, as both were true shoe girls in their day.  But now I have learned that the double shoe gene I posses actually comes from my great-great paternal grandfather.  No, this is not a major confession or deeply held family secret about a secret cross-dressing past… it was simply a well-laid business plan.

This past week my father was helping my grandmother go through some family paperwork.  At one point during this process, he learned that my great-great grandfather had been a cobbler that owned his own shop.  Next door to the shop was a little tavern that he owned as well.  When business at the shoe store was slow and the town seemed empty, my enterprising ancestor decided to open a tavern that would draw in the residents from the more distant areas near the town.  Being a genius of a man, he realized that while the men drank, the women could shop; thus creating a bloodline fueled (nourished) by shoes and booze.  

Clearly, my great-great father was an innovator and businessman far before his time—today, people would call him an entrepreneur. You have to wonder if today he would run a high-end cocktail lounge with a shoe salon attached.  Forget, Skinny Girl Margaritas and get ready for “Stiletto Shots”—the drink that fits in your high heel.   

Fast forward a few generations and he can find his great-great granddaughter most nights in her favorite heels sipping a cocktail aroundKey West.  Having the sudden knowledge of this part of my family’s past has given me a better understanding of myself.  It has often been asked how a girl who likes fashion and shoes so much could find herself in a town where bars, beaches, and boat docks provide some major shoe hazards.  Wouldn’t I prefer to live somewhere with unending shoe stores and where the art of walking in a six-inch stiletto is appreciated? 

Yet, I stay on my little island where my heels can garner strange looks from flip-flopped observers as I am biking to my favorite bar.  And now I know that my love for both shoes and a good drink come from something greater than the logical explanation of drinking to dull the expected foot pain that comes with many of my shoes.  My love of shoes comes from a long family line of shoe lovers who also happen to value a strong drink at the end of the day. 

As Hank Jr. would say; “They all ask me, shoe girl why do you drink, why do you wear heels, why must you live out the blogs that you wrote?  Stop and think it over; try to put yourself in my unique position.  If I get drunk and wear stilettos all over town, I’m just carrying on an old family tradition.”

 

Queens of Soles June 28, 2011

Filed under: Love Me, Love My Shoes — theislandshoegirl @ 10:17 am
Tags: , , , , ,

Sure these Steve Madden stilettos could cause an injury but they are still too cute to pass up. Photo by Jean Thornton.

The Queen of Soul and I have something in common this week.  We have both suffered foot injuries due to our love of high heels.  According to news reports, Aretha Franklin apparently stumbled over a pile (yeah that’s right I said PILE) of Jimmy Choo shoes and stepped on top of spiked-sandal, resulting in fracture toe.  My injury was caused by a slip and fall in some very lovely stilettos. They were not Choos but I also found myself with a broken bone. While my damaged foot may not have garnered the attention that Aretha’s has (though honestly it should have been on the Google news feed) I feel a little closer to my sole sister this week all the same. 

 I certainly do sympathize with Aretha who has been snapped hobbling about in her medically-fitted blue boot.  My guess is that it was not designed by Jimmy Choo or any other notable person.  My own boot was actually larger, so Aretha is getting off a little easy in my mind.  I also imagine Aretha has a staff to help out while she is lopsided.  I only had my dog and some friends to rely on. 

 But all the staff in the world can not undue the mental anguish that accompanies a forced shoe confinement.  Aretha was quoted as asking, “How am I supposed to match my Marc Jacobs gown with this wooden blue shoe?”  I hear you loud and clear, Aretha, as I had to match my own boot to a bridesmaid dress.  Of course I took off the boot and painfully wore a stiletto to spare myself that greater pain of walking down the aisle in that boot.  This was not recommended by my doctor; in fact, I got a very disapproving look—so don’t mention a situation like that to your physician. 

 I did continue to wear a high heel on my other foot; finally I found a place for kitten heels in my wardrobe.  So Aretha, do not fear that all sense of shoe fashion is lost to you; instead it is merely reduced by 50%.  You can still be fabulous and fashionable; you just might be slightly lopsided.  I found that even just wearing one heel made me feel much better and isn’t a positive attitude the key to a quick recovery?

 My fellow Sole Sister may have to take her injury in stride over the next several weeks.  Broken bones do take time to heal, plus the added stress a foot must endure in our daily routines can make it very tricky.  From one on-the-go lady to another, take some time to just slow down, Aretha.  Prop up that foot and read a book, catch up on your fashion magazines or even just indulge in a little junk television.  Bravo has a whole summer schedule of fighting housewives to keep you amused.     

 If you get really bored, feel free to swing down to Key West. We can hangout together, talk about shoes, go to karaoke bars—I’ll even take that pile of dangerous Jimmy Choos off your hands…or should I say feet, if it means you will be safe.  Don’t worry, Aretha, soon enough you will be back in your stilettos, dancing and singing for all of your fans.  And your broken toe will be just a distant memory.

 Take this Queen of Sole’s advice: from here on out and make sure your Jimmy Choos are properly stored.  You have already proven your shoes are dangerous… and I heard the new fall line is drop dead gorgeous.

 

After Valentine’s Day February 20, 2011

Filed under: Love Me, Love My Shoes — theislandshoegirl @ 10:18 am
Tags: , , , , ,

It's easy to love and be loved in these Staurt Weitzman's. Photo by Jean Thornton.

Love was in the air this past week—or at least in the mail, the flowers and the commercials when it came to Valentine’s Day. As a single girl, I am not one to go crazy with hearts, fat babies, and flying arrows. Even when with someone special you will seldom find me slinging arrows or love poems around. It’s not that I don’t appreciate or value love, but I sometimes struggle to understand all of the fuss over February 14th. It’s not like there is a shoe sale involved, so why should all of us gals get our panties all in bunch over it?

Okay, perhaps right now I sound like a bitter lady. The truth is I am far from sour on Valentine’s Day; in fact, I enjoy any excuse to wear a salacious pair of red Jimmy Choos. I freely give advice on how to rock a pink strappy stiletto or a cute red dress on this love-filled day. I will even advise a male friend on how to appropriately commemorate the day with flowers or a gift. Trust me; many a female friend owes me a debt of gratitude for some of their nicer jewelry. So clearly I am no more against the actual Valentine’s Day than I am against a cute sling-back.

What does bother me about the day is how women sometimes respond to it. I am ready to be hated… but some of you ladies need to tone it down a notch. Honestly, by 8am on February 14th I could show you 10 Facebook love proclamations, ranging from announcements that life only began when they met their significant others to declarations of how miserable they would be without their deepest love. Really? Because I thought I knew you in college and you were pretty cool back then, so was that like a figment of my imagination?

As the day progresses, the posts become less about love and more about the gifts. I am all for displaying a little bit of bling, but at what point does it become tacky to upload a photo to show all your friends? Glad you’re not materialistic; otherwise, your friend’s would not have known the exact number of carats in those new earrings you have posted from you phone…during your romantic dinner. Nothing says ‘I love you’, like having to interrupt a date to brag to your friends.

By the end of Valentine’s Day I was so bogged down with postings about unending love, heart-shaped necklaces, and exotic roses, I had to wonder; just how special is Valentine’s Day when everyone is doing it? One friend d id post that to her every day was special with her husband, but I might have admired this more if it was done on a random Monday and not one covered in hearts and teddy bears by the card industry. To me it’s like wearing Stuart Weitzman’s on a red carpet—yeah, they look fabulous and stunning, but it’s almost too expected. Wouldn’t those same Weitzman’s be more remarkable on another day of the week when they are not expected?

Later into Valentine’s night, I could not help but wonder how many couples had waited for a table at restaurant that was overbooked or shared a high calorie dessert they would have to work off tomorrow on the treadmill in name of Valentine’s Day and not in the name of love. Would Tuesday be all the more rushed because of a late Monday spent forcing romantic gestures? Maybe the best use of the day was not Facebook post declaring love, pink tissue paper, and the use of red lipstick best left to Coco Chanel. Maybe that day and every other day should be filled with the little ways love can be shown. The simple gestures of trust a spouse has in the other. The little things we do to make another’s day go smoother such as taking out the recycling. Or just the daily embraces that remind someone we care on the deepest level possible. Those are the things that make a single girl admire love between others.

Days and weeks later, cards will be tucked or thrown away, flowers will have wilted and died, and even a cute, heart-clutching teddy bear gets set aside. What remains at the core of a truly great loving relationship are those little ways we share love daily. And while vacuuming or filling up your car is not the stuff that shows up in great love poems or Facebook posts, they are the things that often mean the most. Because they are things that make living and loving a little less rushed and a little more relaxed. Leaving time for a little bit longer kiss.

 

Where’s My Prince? November 21, 2010

Filed under: Love Me, Love My Shoes — theislandshoegirl @ 8:37 am
Tags: , , , ,

These Renee Cavalli's are perfect for a princess or an everday shoe girl. Photo by Jean Thornton

It happened this week.  My hopes and those of many other twenty-something women—and probably those of a few cougars too—all around the world were dashed by a somewhat expected announcement.  Prince William stole away our dreams of one day gaining the title “Her Royal Highness” and the fabulous jewelry that comes with it, leaving this Island Shoe Girl to sit in her Jimmy Choos imagining a Prince slipping on a pair of leather insoles (of course in my fantasy I could never ‘lose’ a shoe). 

And while Cinderella remains proof to hopeless shoe romantics everywhere that shoes really do lead to happy-ever-after moments, there is simply not enough true blueblood Princes out there to give every girl’s story a fairytale ending.   In all fairness to Kate Middleton, who someday will be Queen Catherine, she is actually a lovely girl.  So the collective “what the f-bomb” shouted at televisions by single girls around the world should not be directed at her but at the news that Prince William is officially off the market.

The Prince—single shoe girl ratio is greatly skewed and certainly not in my favor, which leaves me to ask, Where’s MY Prince?  Where is the white horse, the rescue from the hum-drum, and the introduction into the world of ballrooms and Fairy Godmothers?  Apparently my prince is not in Jolly Old England!  Yes, Prince Harry is left but his smile is less bad boy and more tabloid boy.

The truth is that neither I nor any of the other shoe princesses out there who secretly longed for Prince William actually thought he was going to Facebook friend us even though the Queen and I both like Glee.  But this ends the last childhood bed-time story for many of us.  Many women my age we grew up with the idea that there really are Princes out there—and that they just might sweep us off our glass slippers.       

Every fairytale has its magical ending and I think deep down inside I wanted to hold onto that belief that magical kisses do wake us from the deep slumbers of daily lives that filled with laundry and all those less glamorous moments.   Think of all the Princesses we idolized growing up: the cast-off Cinderella scrubbing chimneys, the housekeeping Snow White putting up with a band of moody dwarfs, and poor Sleeping Beauty sent to live in the woods only to be almost fatally wounded by a sewing machine.  Is it no wonder I am afraid to wash dishes—hello, they could be a trick laid out by a wicked witch!

Perhaps the let down I felt, and I believe many other ladies felt too when hearing the news of Prince William’s proposal, was not the loss of true love, but the loss of true belief that something resembling a real life fairytale could be reality.  And yet in some ways, Kate Middleton may have proven that fairytales can indeed come true.  After all, she is a girl from common beginnings—although a fairly wealthy common beginning—she has been swept off her feet by a real life prince and will even get a crown with her happy ending.

Yes, single shoe princesses around the world lost a prince this week, but we gained a happy ending.  Kate has given us an exception to the everyday rules that tell us fairytale endings are only in the storybooks.    So while we may not all get royal weddings or the crown jewels—and no one will curtsey as I walk into work on Monday morning, I will have a little spring in my step because Princes do show up and marry everyday girls and that makes this everyday common-shoe-girl believe in happy endings.  Maybe I will wear a slip-on heel this weekend…just in case any handsome man might be nearby to slide it back on should I happen to ‘lose’ it.  After all if one girl’s fairytale can come true, why not mine.

 

The Very Best August 8, 2010

Filed under: Love Me, Love My Shoes — theislandshoegirl @ 8:42 am
Tags: , , , , , ,

Manolos for when you want the very best. Photo by Jean Thornton

It is no secret that I love shoes, the higher the better. The more I buy, the more I need. I can look at my collection of 160+ pairs of shoes and find not a single pair to go with my outfit. Find me in a shoe section and I usually have at least three boxes in my arms as I try on pair number four. I spend more on shoes in a year than I do on health care and food combined. Some of my shoes have come with a hefty price tag and, while I am a bargain shopper, I have dropped more on one pair of shoes than some spend on their shoes in a full year. But I deserve the very best, right?

It is wrong to ask a friend to settle for a partner who makes them less than 100% happy. You would never advise a dear friend to overlook an unpleasant personality quality for the sake of getting the better deal. To suggest that one should settle is the opposite of what every romantic movie has ever taught us. No, you are supposed to hold out and hold onto hope that the very best match is out there. So why does it always seem that it is okay to question how much is spent to get the very best in other things?

Amateur shoe shoppers or sidewalk observers of my heels frequently ask the question, “how much?” The old saying “if you have to ask you can’t afford it,” may sound like a rude response but I wish sometimes I could just say that. Because if I answer honestly, I most likely will get a rude response in return when I am told, “I would never,” or “Are they really worth it,” or perhaps just a dramatic eye widening. This is why I have developed the technique of telling both the original price and the sale price I paid for them so at least I sound thrifty even if my shoes make me look like Imelda Marcus.

In reality, what business is it of anyone else how much my shoes cost or how many pairs I may acquire in one shopping trip? Does my sharing my shoe budget make them sleep better at night knowing that they can live without a new pair of Manolos while I can not? Perhaps if I questioned the cost of their child; delivery, car seat, food… is that kid really worth it? Oh but if I did that, I would be rude.

For me the real question is, do I deserve the best in only some areas of life? For years it has been pounded into my head not to accept anyone who does not complement my life and dreams as well as brings a smile to my face. If a job makes you miserable or a career overrides other joys, you are encouraged to change them. When an environment is confining to your personal growth, a move is in order to revitalize yourself. I think criticizing how I spend my money or what I spend it on contradicts the idea that I deserve the very best too. Why shouldn’t happiness and quality apply to every aspect of my life?

Maybe it’s the cost factor, since money is not supposed to buy you love or other forms of happiness. (I say whoever said that never tried on Chanel.) Perhaps we all long secretly for a more natural and free version of the very best. Lets face it, if there is a free sofa on the side of the road it is not out there because it is the best and your neighbor wanted you to have only the best free sofa. In fact I am guessing the best sofa is in the house.

So I maintain there is nothing wrong with purchasing the very best of what you are looking for, just as there is nothing wrong with holding out for the perfect partner or switching careers to be more fulfilled and happier. If choosing Louboutin’s over Payless means getting the very best and the happiness that comes with the very best, I don’t think I am wrong to drop my hard-earned money on a designer label. It would be no more wrong than holding out for Mister Right.

As for those who still want to question the value of a designer shoe… I welcome your inquiries. But in return, your husband and your child are not off limits.

 

Where the (Single) Boys Are July 11, 2010

Filed under: Love Me, Love My Shoes — theislandshoegirl @ 7:39 am
Tags: , , , , , ,

Where the shoes are is my main concern... and hopefully they are on my feet! Photo by Jean Thornton

Single life is not the way some songs proclaim it to be and simply putting your hand up will not make it any easier. I was thinking about the realities of single life this weekend after a “soon to be single again” woman asked me about the dating scene in Key West. Since finding a good single guy in Key West is a lot like finding a Chanel purse at TJ Maxx, I am not sure my answer brought her any solace.

Our little island does have its fair share of males—we are not women of the Amazon down here—but there are some factors to consider before any single woman decides to try to strike boyfriend gold in Key West. First, there are many married guys in Key West, and if that doesn’t stop you then you are reading the wrong blog. Second, Key West has many gay men which is great for other single gay men but not so great for single straight women. (Regardless, their ability to throw a parade is greatly appreciated.) Third, if you are a true Key West girl you want a true Key West guy and not one with plans to move or a job that would require a transfer, so there go the Coast Guard and Navy boys. By the time you factor in personal preferences and natural laws of attraction, even Connie Francis would be sarcastically asking, “Where are the boys?”

So what advice does a seasoned Island Single Girl give someone jumping back into the dating pool? It was hard for me to find a definitive answer for her. For me, single life in Key West is good I work a lot. Between a demanding full-time job, a part-time job, a blog, and a radio show, the free moments are not overwhelming me. And often the few free moments that do come along are filled with good friends and social obligations. So even when my dating life is not frantic I cannot really find either the time to change that or the desire to change.

With all that said, I do have the moments of wanting a partner; for example, when I have a lot of groceries to carry or need to change the windshield wipers. So perhaps at this stage I am looking for a handyman rather than a ring on the hand. Something told me that recommending a home repair service for the soon-to-be-single might not be what she wants to hear. And it might not be what I want to tell her. I didn’t lie, but I did sugar-coat a little. I told her there are good guys out there; they are just waiting for us to arrive, to buy us drinks, and to hear the grueling details of our daily lives from our jobs to our shoe closets.

What I omit is that these guys may be out there with glasses of Pinot Grigo for us, but there is a good chance it may take a really long time to find the right one—IF you do. I remind her that she can’t find Mister Right by staying with Mister Wrong. I hate this because I cannot promise that she will ever find Mister Right or that he will bring her the happiness she is looking for.

She asks if I ever think of moving someplace where the dating scene is better. This could have been an opportunity to start a medley of musical numbers about finding boys and their waiting warm embraces and smiling faces. Instead I tell her my life is in Key West and that if there is a Mister Right for me I have faith I will find him here. Where her Mister Right lives…well, that could be a different story that she will have to write.

Soon, she will be a single girl again, joining the ranks of the many, and some of us are very proud to belong to that group. What lies ahead of her—or any other single girl—is truly a mystery. She may find love her first night out or while filling up her gas tank, or it may be a long time from today. Either way the best advice I can offer is that wherever the single boys are, I hope they are having fun. Because where this single girl is—she is having fun too.

 

The Flap about Flip Flops June 13, 2010

Filed under: Love Me, Love My Shoes — theislandshoegirl @ 7:24 am
Tags: , , , , , ,

These Kate & Kelly heels sure seem like the perfect summer shoe. Photo by Jean Thornton

Vindication is finally mine! After years of being told mainly by flip flops wearing folks that my high heels would destroy my feet, knees, hips and back, at long last there is evidence that shows flip flops are actually more destructive than my lovely high heels. Research from the University of Louisiana-Lafayette presented at the American College of Sports Medicine’s annual meeting and supported by the director of the Non-surgical Foot and Ankle Service at the Hospital of Special Surgery in New York has now provided me the facts needed to defend my shoes. I have suffered greatly for my love of shoes, physically and emotionally. But today I stand in my heels before those who pledge allegiance to flip flops and say, “Not today, not tomorrow, not ever again will you claim foot comfort and safety to me!”

For many of us, the first signs of summer are not the flowers blooming in spring or May showers replacing winter snow flurries; instead, it is the arrival of flip flops in many stores across the country. Yes, from shoe stores to department store and even drugstores and grocery stores, these little bits of plastic foot fashions pop up. And while their bright colors and generally very low…dare I say “cheap” prices make them all the more tempting, there is a dirty little secret about these summer toe huggers: they are dangerous for your body; maybe even more so than a pair of heels.

Shock and dismay may well appear faster than a July thunderstorm, but I am not busting your flip flop strap just for shear joy. Consider this a health advisory of sorts. The reality is that flip flops are not good for your summer wardrobe for many reasons. The soft and comfy feeling provided by their spongy soles offers no arch support, creating a situation where your foot rolls inward which leads to pains in your heels, arches, balls of feet, and, of course, all of those 10 little toes!

It doesn’t stop there! Your poor leg muscles are being worked overtime. Without the support of a sturdy strap (most flip flops have only a thin V-shaped strap), there is little keeping the slab of plastic on your foot; thus you end up gripping with your toes which causes the tendons and muscles in your feet to do all the work and often leads to tendonitis. This is especially true if you are accustomed to wearing shoes with a heel because your calf muscles are often overstretched while wearing flat shoes. Honestly, if my legs are going to hurt from shoes, why not make them hurt from super-cute Kate Spade heels!

And flip flops will make your feet ugly in more ways than one. First, exposing your foot to air dries out your skin, causing them to become callused which could cause cracking and bleeding…not cute and very painful! Beyond the skin blemishes, excessive prolonged wear can lead to hammertoes, stress fractures, and bunions—any of which can lead to surgery, scars, and ugly orthopedic boots in place of Christian Louboutain knee-high boots.

The pains and aches don’t stop at your ankles! Kiss your confident stride goodbye; flip flops make you change your pace, causing you to take shorter steps which leads to pain in the lower back and hips. The flip flop can also cause a literal ‘flop’ since the material they are usually made of can become very slippery when wet and does not provide good traction. All of these factors cannot help but leave even the most skeptical shoe observer concerned about the safety and practicality of a flip flop.

So what is the flat shoe fan to do this summer? The key is to avoid cheap shoes—always a good rule of thumb… or toe. You get what you pay for which may be shin splints and sprained ankles if you only spend $3.99 for your footwear. Choose wider straps and deeper, firmer sole support for your heels and arches. And limit your time in flip flops, especially when walking great distances.

If both flip flops and stilettos cause damage, then this Island Shoe Girl is resigned to wearing only heels—I might as well enjoy some added heights. I know there are many out there who are not as committed to tall shoes as I am, but there is a very classic slightly heeled solution. The ‘kitten heel’ is a friend to the summer frolicker. Made popular by the lovely Audrey Hepburn, it offers a low heel generally 1- 2 inches high, creating an elegant shape while also keeping you somewhat grounded. The kitten heel makes a wonderful complement to a sundress and is even included in “Shoe Godfather” Manolo Blanhik’s line.

At last summer is here! Skies are blue, pools are open, and feet want to bask in the warmth of the sun too. So hit the beach, fire up the barbeque, and catch some fire flies. Just remember: at the end of that leisurely summer stroll in your flip flops, your toes, heels, ankles, knees and back will most likely be in a need of a little leisure time too.

 

50 More Ways to Leave Your Lover April 25, 2010

Filed under: Love Me, Love My Shoes — theislandshoegirl @ 7:55 am
Tags: , , , , , , , ,

Heels perfect for slipping out the back. Photo by Jean Thornton

Paul Simon gave us fifty ways to leave our lovers in 1975; thirty-five years later I can not help but think there must fifty more ways to go about it.  With today’s technology a girl doesn’t have to worry about pulling a Cinderella when dashing for the door; hardly any relationship is worth giving up a good shoe. 

You just slip on a Choo, Lou; type a quick Tweet, Pete; change your Facebook status Gladys.  Just get yourself free.  End it with text, Rex—you don’t need to type much.  Just do it by email, Phil.  And get yourself free. 

Post an ad on Craig’s list, Celeste; sell his stuff on eBay, Fay.   You put on your Manolo’s, Lola.   Just listen to me.  You don’t have to blog long; you push a few keys, Lee.  And get yourself free. 

Basically, from a Blackberry most of us can cover all aspects of a break up and download Fergie’s “Labels or Love,” before we can say, “its not you it’s me” and without going over our daytime minutes.  I know this all sounds incredibly harsh, but the longer you are single in this world, the more exit strategies you need.  It’s not enough to just tell him that he doesn’t go with your new stilettos and then screen your calls; for every way out, there is also a consequence.  And short of a YouTube video, sometimes any idea for an exit makes sense. 

For this single shoe girl, there are times when I think the many tech friendly ways out of a relationship are a safer bet then staying in.  Like a gambler with the smallest bank at the table, I have the most to win and the least to lose if I exit the game early.  It’s easier to find a sound reason for folding my hand early—at the slightest warning sign—than staying in and risking a trickier more complicated game.  Oh, Kenny Roger’s, you were right: there are times you gotta know when to run. 

And therein lays the dilemma for the single girl or guy.  If having nothing to lose is almost like having it all, then is having no one to lose like having everyone to find?  When you’re a single girl there is an element of discovery and unknown possibilities whenever you meet someone new.  But once you find the “one” or that person who you at least think is the “one”, how tightly do you hang on?  Is it a blind love that allows us to overlook the flaws, or is there ever that pit-of-the-stomach feeling that signals this just may not be right?

The simple truth is that the further into a relationship a person gets, the harder it is to get out.  That may be why the “over anxious” dater scares me so much.   If we are in this far after date #2, what are you going to be like after date #22?  It’s like betting your whole bank on the first hand.  So in the first few dates it’s okay to let a flaw such as frequency of texting, or how he holds his fork, or a really stupid joke become the straw that broke your camel-colored pumps.  Yet, if you are still hanging in at 3 months, then you have a relationship and you are supposed to forgive the stupid things.  Not that forgiveness is bad; it’s just that sometimes we start to forgive too much and we end up needing that list of ways to leave. 

Rhymin’ Simon may be smart to keep his list of fifty ways to leave and add a few more of my high tech backdoors.  As silly as it may sound, I have a feeling that when a relationship is really good your list is never needed.   But that list is also good to have on hand for the times when you need a quick exit for good reason.  After all, every now and then you just have “to get yourself free”.

 

Things More Important Than Shoes March 21, 2010

Filed under: Love Me, Love My Shoes — theislandshoegirl @ 10:09 am
Tags: , , , , ,

A well rounded shoe girl has many elements just like these awesome Steve Madden Wedges. Photo by Jean Thornton

In my constant quest for the next great pair of shoes, others often tell me I have more than enough.  If the world intended me to have only five pairs then it would not offer me so many options and varieties; thus, I am simply a product of my environment! 

Good excuse, huh?  I do sense at times that my shoe extravagance may cause others to believe that I value my shoes above all else.  The nagging look in their eyes asks the question I know they are holding back, “Do you know there are things more important than shoes in life?”  Yes, I do know there are more important things in life than shoes. 

There are things more important than shoes. There is family and mine is far more valuable than shoes.  I have parents who loved their children long before we were ever physical parts of their lives.  They saved and sacrificed for us when we our lives were only dreams of first steps, graduations, and the ways we would change the world.  They loved and still love me enough to let me walk my own path even when it is far from them; they even let me do it in un-sensible shoes.   My two older brothers were cursed with one of the crazier little sisters they might ever have to watch out for.  It was their task to know when to protect me and, most importantly, to know when to let me face reality. This surely has been one of the greatest challenges of their lives.  And the wonderful women they have exposed to both their sister’s critical eye and her sharp tongue have decided to stick around anyway and marry them. 

I know that friendship is more important than shoes.  My friends know I would give up every last heel if I thought for a moment that it could give them every joyful moment they could want in life.  To value a friend so much that they know—despite how much you dread it—you will even put on a bridesmaid dress for them.  A friendship is only half of what it can be when you say that your friend will always be there for you.  It is when you are privileged to actually BE there for that friend that you experience the full capacity of friendship.  When your friend seeks and takes your advice and encouragement because they trust you so fully for the sole reason that you have proven yourself and they have forgotten any time you were ever wrong. 

There are careers that are more important in life than shoes.  I am not talking about a job that makes you successful but when you make that job a success.  That desire in life not to make a paycheck, but to make others see that this job makes the world a better place.  The personal desire and realization that while we hope to always be more than our title, it is also important for us to feel that our title is more than something we just “do” the majority of our life.  There surely are more important things to life than our jobs, yet we cannot discredit the value it does give our lives and we should never apologize for knowing it.  

Of course there are people who out rank shoes.  I do not mean that there are a select group of people who deserve the title of ‘important’.  As a result of my job it has been both a blessing and a challenge that I get to see the value in every person—even those who society has told they are not of value.  It can be unbearably frustrating to see the good in someone when few others see it, often times even that person the good is in.  It can be gut wrenching to know that, while the good in someone can never truly be lost, it can be unrecognized and unnoticed as if it never existed.   

There are things more important in life than shoes, but my shoes also have a place and value beyond what they appear to offer.  While all these things are extremely dear and important to me, there is often little I can do to totally protect them.  Shoes I can put in a closet and ensure that at the end of the night they are safe and sound.  There is no closet large enough for me to lock away family, friends, career and people.  If I could somehow find a way to protect these things from the real and imagined threats and fears of serious illness or injury, bad days, budget cuts, and monsters that go bump in the night, shoes may not provide such a comfort for me.

After all is said and done we all have some luxury item we cherish that others may not exactly understand.  Whether that is hundreds of shoes, a collection of records begun in childhood, the vintage car restored with care, or a scrapbook hobby, they are the things we can check on at the end of the day.  So when I take one last look at my shoe closet every night as I head towards bed, I may be checking to make sure all those silly shoes are lined up and in their place.  I can only watch over and protect the things I can keep in a closet, but I can hope that God is watching out for all the things I find more important than shoes that do not fit in a closet. 

 

 
Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.